I need my i hate summer icon back
Jul. 23rd, 2010 10:13 pmSince I don’t work Fridays (the one good thing about summer school) I scooted north to Columbus to take advantage of the last two weeks of my membership at the Franklin Conservancy and see the new exhibit, savage garden, which is a display of carnivorous plants. I love Venus fly traps, pitcher plants and sundews. So I flat iron the hair do the make up and off I go. They had my beloved carnivorous plants in abundance. My stories talk to me all the way up, so much so I thought I was only at Circleville and suddenly there was my Columbus exit.
But things start going awry quickly. The mercury is climbing. It’s nearing triple digits
Inside the hot houses it’s unbearable. I can not breathe. Sweat is in my eyes so much I can no longer focus. I haven’t even looked at what the photos look like. They have little planters in the hallways, they have planted the savage plants in among the regular ones, they’ve even planted them outside but many of them looked like they were struggling, especially the outside ones. It ended up being a bit disappointing but they did try their best. They had artwork commissioned for this and it was everywhere. I loved that they had a red pitcher plant named Dana’s Delight. I wanted it. I could have had it. But I’ve heard that they’re hard to keep alive and thinking on the ones that were under the care of expert horticulturalists and knowing they weren’t that good, I bought another pre-bonsai, a rain tree. I can hear silvrethorn now shouting, dingdong I could have given you a hundred of those. They were also selling leggy tomato seedlings for a buck so I got a golden girl and a lemon boy. We shall see if they can be saved.
People were giving me a wide berth and I thought it was because I had an armful of plants. But no, I go into the bathroom and saw my reflection. I should have told people I fell in the koi pond, that’s how sweaty I was. My makeup had run like an insane clown. My clothing had huge wet spots all over them and my hair. OMG my hair. See, in order to get my Italian brillo pad hair straight, I have to use a) lots of hair spray b) root lift to keep it from looking like a helmet. Well root lift is a lot like spray foam or superglue. My hair tried to recurl from the humidity but it couldn’t. It was sticking up everywhere. I tried to wet it down. That made it worse. A brush couldn’t get through it. At least I wiped my makeup off and wished I had brought a change of clothes.
I headed to the short north to shop and eat but once I was at the Happy Greek waiting on my gyro platter, the heat caught up to me. I got nauseous and exhausted. I didn’t shop (the short north is the artsy fartsy type of place, you have to walk the city blocks to shop) Instead I went to Trader Joe’s because Flippy has been telling me I had to get the mango chutney. I got that and a ton more including a delicious soft honey goat cheese, a disappointing brie and accidentally bought a wine that sounded so good last time but I thought I hadn’t bought but did.
Whole Food market was up next. They HAD my fig tree. JOY. I wanted the Celeste but ended up with the brown turkey because it said ‘self pollinating’ and the Celeste did not. Who knew that for 5$ on Friday at five at Whole Food you get a wine glass and get to taste five wines and five dinners? Go Whole Food, you expensive bastard. They had a black cherry brisket that was out of this world and I don’t even like brisket. Bought that sauce, my usual olives, my usual brie, booze and naturally my fig.
From there it was Borders to buy more manga than I need then to dinner. I’m still nauseous and expecting to burst into flames at any moment. Take 90% of dinner home. Stop at the other Borders and get the summer drink white caramel latte. I take off shoes and socks to drive home.
Please brain be remembering that you are in a body that is lactose intolerant. Mochas are okay, less milk. Lattes make you feel like that larva from Alien is eating out of you. You make this mistake every time. Got home and Kanda is like OMG get out of my way. I need to be in the a/c, woman. He looks all pitifully shagged out.


But things start going awry quickly. The mercury is climbing. It’s nearing triple digits
Inside the hot houses it’s unbearable. I can not breathe. Sweat is in my eyes so much I can no longer focus. I haven’t even looked at what the photos look like. They have little planters in the hallways, they have planted the savage plants in among the regular ones, they’ve even planted them outside but many of them looked like they were struggling, especially the outside ones. It ended up being a bit disappointing but they did try their best. They had artwork commissioned for this and it was everywhere. I loved that they had a red pitcher plant named Dana’s Delight. I wanted it. I could have had it. But I’ve heard that they’re hard to keep alive and thinking on the ones that were under the care of expert horticulturalists and knowing they weren’t that good, I bought another pre-bonsai, a rain tree. I can hear silvrethorn now shouting, dingdong I could have given you a hundred of those. They were also selling leggy tomato seedlings for a buck so I got a golden girl and a lemon boy. We shall see if they can be saved.
People were giving me a wide berth and I thought it was because I had an armful of plants. But no, I go into the bathroom and saw my reflection. I should have told people I fell in the koi pond, that’s how sweaty I was. My makeup had run like an insane clown. My clothing had huge wet spots all over them and my hair. OMG my hair. See, in order to get my Italian brillo pad hair straight, I have to use a) lots of hair spray b) root lift to keep it from looking like a helmet. Well root lift is a lot like spray foam or superglue. My hair tried to recurl from the humidity but it couldn’t. It was sticking up everywhere. I tried to wet it down. That made it worse. A brush couldn’t get through it. At least I wiped my makeup off and wished I had brought a change of clothes.
I headed to the short north to shop and eat but once I was at the Happy Greek waiting on my gyro platter, the heat caught up to me. I got nauseous and exhausted. I didn’t shop (the short north is the artsy fartsy type of place, you have to walk the city blocks to shop) Instead I went to Trader Joe’s because Flippy has been telling me I had to get the mango chutney. I got that and a ton more including a delicious soft honey goat cheese, a disappointing brie and accidentally bought a wine that sounded so good last time but I thought I hadn’t bought but did.
Whole Food market was up next. They HAD my fig tree. JOY. I wanted the Celeste but ended up with the brown turkey because it said ‘self pollinating’ and the Celeste did not. Who knew that for 5$ on Friday at five at Whole Food you get a wine glass and get to taste five wines and five dinners? Go Whole Food, you expensive bastard. They had a black cherry brisket that was out of this world and I don’t even like brisket. Bought that sauce, my usual olives, my usual brie, booze and naturally my fig.
From there it was Borders to buy more manga than I need then to dinner. I’m still nauseous and expecting to burst into flames at any moment. Take 90% of dinner home. Stop at the other Borders and get the summer drink white caramel latte. I take off shoes and socks to drive home.
Please brain be remembering that you are in a body that is lactose intolerant. Mochas are okay, less milk. Lattes make you feel like that larva from Alien is eating out of you. You make this mistake every time. Got home and Kanda is like OMG get out of my way. I need to be in the a/c, woman. He looks all pitifully shagged out.



no subject
Date: 2010-07-24 02:22 am (UTC)Glad you were able to get some cool stuff and have a (mostly) fun day out. :D I'm bummed at myself because I booked dogs for tomorrow even though I try not to groom every Saturday. I need time to get all my shit together for my vacation and leaving Bob in charge of the girls (OH GOD HELP US!!!!!!).
Need to walk said girls, but every time I think about it is starts raining and storming again.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-24 03:12 am (UTC)We think our fig tree is a Celeste, because they certainly aren't brown turkeys that come off of it, and we now get, quite literally, THOUSANDS of figs in a season (and boy, is it producing now! We have four jars of fig jelly, and there's a whole 'nother batch ready to be picked THIS week).
So I'm assuming it's self-pollinating.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-24 03:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-24 03:18 am (UTC)i'm so glad i'm not working in this but my garden still isn't weeded I can't bear this heat
yeah I can see why you booked a weekend. Have fun. poor bob
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