cornerofmadness

What a difference a week makes. No weather issues driving up to Berger hospital. Also what a difference this made. In Chillicothe the health center is in a defunct mall building and very clinic in attitude. I.e. I walked into the room with pants on and my shoes. This time the lumbar medial nerve block was in the hospital...and this was like a surgery, down to the stupid hospital slippers (what a waste of money and materials), a paper hat, hospital gown and was wheeled in in a wheelchair.

This time it hurt more. Like a lot more. it's a total of 6 punctures (three per side) and one of them I was thinking you don't need the contrast dye, trust me you found the nerve because that thing fired from hip to big toe the moment the needle touched it. Ah well, does it help, yes. Will I be having the radio ablation...we'll see.

Since I was in Circleville I went to Richie's NY corner deli (he is from NYC) and it was a yummy deli sandwich. I failed to find shoes at the shoe store and I trundled on home, almost fell asleep reading but Rocket yelled FEED ME in my ear. Also no, it was not dinner time. He pouted, sat with me as I was reading my own fanfic (found errors naturally) we both nodded off until he fell off my lap (he sucks at sitting on laps) and that was damn funny.

Betty sent me this A Frankenstein Ballet I need to see this!!!

I was ready to start a new music monday until suzume_seta said too bad you didn't do silver and gold and I was all huffy in my head going I did not forget....omg I forgot silver and gold so....gold this week and silver next week and then I'll move on.

Let's continue with the Music Monday and we're sharing songs that contain a certain color. Since we finished the rainbow, let's pick up colors not on the rainbow. GOLD! Feel free to chime in with your favorite song(s) that follow the weekly letter. Hit me with your favs. I love hearing new music or revisiting older pieces.

( Golden )

On the other hand it's not as bad as it could be either so there's that.

My uncle came through the surgery okay so that's good.

As for me, last time it took over an hour to get to Chillicothe (should take 40 minutes) so I gave myself an hour and fifteen minutes (after not sleeping all night) I get there in 40 minutes...so I go to TJ Maxx. Keep in mind it's 1030 on a Friday. I find a few things, go to pay and it looks like Black Friday (And I had to hear Mariah Carey singing Christmas songs) No lie the line up maze they have at check out is filled and lined up outside it too, no less than 30 people. I don't need a half broken wooden tombstone and a wood spatula that badly. I put it back.

The Sports Med guy goes, yeah can you hang out and see the neurosurgeon today? YEs I can. Sports guy thinks that much of this is just the sheer amount of damage I did in that fall. Fair. He wants to start the cock'scomb hylaronic acid injections (fine). The neuro is the one who did my nerve conduction study. I'm friend's with his mother in law and taught his wife. He comes in and hugs me like I'm a family friend. (well he does know me from family parties)

He thinks as well this is a combo party. Usually neurogenic claudication is from stenosis which I don't really have and the foramina narrowing/pinched nerve is on the left. He agrees that the claudication symptoms could be from the nerve damage in the knee BUT also I have femoral acetabular impingement syndrome, a cracked labrum plus the spondylosis. We could do a spinal stimulator (Nope, I'm not in that much pain) or radio ablation of the nerves going to the facets of the spine and deal with the arthritis that way. Yes we can do that. He think it stands a chance because exercise makes it better. I'm fine walking (backwise that is) it's sitting/standing still hurts and has done since I was a surgeon (leading us to think the impingement syndrome is in play) so we're going to start with a nerve block which if that works the ablation will too. Might have to try epidural steroids too (let's hold off on putting steroids into my CSF)

We have a treatment plan but at the end of the day there is no cure (i knew this) so welcome to yet another chronic illness to go in the bag with all my others.

But this has now run until 130 in the afternoon. My work webinar has started. By the time i get home it'll be over so I'm like screw it. Let's go do something so I go into a part of the historic district of Chillicothe (and got yelled at by some fucker who made a right turn on red and nearly hit me as I'm going through the intersection) I go to Grandview Cemetery. It did have a grand view and some things I've not seen before, like modern day crypts, mini ones but there. I saw an older than the graveyard family graveyard in its center (THe Felix Renick family. I looked him up, a pioneer into Ohio when it was still Native territory who was an 'Indian Hunter' who came to regret it later in life saying there was a huge debt that couldn't be paid) I saw some other weird names (where I wrote them down I don't know) but my favorite last name was Quick Valentine and some poor bastard I thought was named Donald Duck. Nope. It was Dick. Donald Dick which is somehow worse.

I go to Tim Horton for a caramel apple latte, large, hot with a splenda in it. They ask Can you repeat the size and I say large. I pull up to the window and the young woman there has napkins in her hand and a medium drink. I said is that a large. She glares at me, 'you ordered a medium.' No, I didn't. You asked me to repeat it so I said twice I wanted a large. She slams the napkins down and storms off. I call after her, it's fine, I'll take the medium. She stalks back over. 'It wasn't me that took your order,' as storms back off (she was wearing the drive thru head set so I assumed it was her) I can hear her complaining about me in the back and she sends someone else out to take my money and give me the drink which she obviously did nothing but pour cold milk into because it was cold but I wasn't about to send it back. I don't think I need to go to this Tim Horton's again. I know they don't get paid well (and I did plan to tip) but there was no need for this level of rudeness when all I did was say I asked for the large but that's fine I'll take the medium.

I get home and start updating my monthly reading thing, sitting my task chair. I suddenly have pain in my neck and I look at the monitor and see it's 6:15pm. How can that be? It's 8 in the morning. I look down and think WHY am I in yesterday's clothes and how did I even get into the computer room. It takes a good two minutes before I realize, it's still the same day and I fell asleep sitting up for an hour. I'm just glad I was home before my brain turned off like someone flipped a switch.

And now that trip to Mexico might be back on which means I'll have to come back down here if we go. I can't say how much I do not want to go until March.

I have the weekly fandom recs ( plenty under here )

My main achievement was to get the MRI on my back today and not clean any of the things I needed to clean. Whee.

I did get a lot of writing done.

so enjoy the stories. Since my spook_me story is long I'll post it here tomorrow. Have another long one (that is getting so ignored right now. Ah, so we don't like seeing the sex worker aspect of Angel Dust)

Title: Love Bites (But So Do I)

Summary: Just when Angel thinks he’ll finally get to finish filming his erotic horror movie, things go sideways yet again and he’s reminded why you never bathe alone.

Author Note - Spikesgirl58’s six word prompt challenge. The six words were Expression, Pace, Important, Create, Surreal & Fire Also written for Lyrical Titles for the prompt Lyric with "love" or "hate" using Love Bites (but so do I) by Halestorm, and the allbingo prompt of Never bathe especially when in the house alone.

( Loves Bites under here or at the above link )







Felicitous The Owl House

It Was Then That She Knew Hazbin Hotel

Wrong Stargate SG-1

Their Scents Hazbin Hotel

Fault Hazbin Hotel

running to stand still Star Trek: Voyager

Holiday Of A Lifetime Torchwood

How did I get it so wrong? Call of Duty (Video Games)

Stealing Recipes Hazbin Hotel

When it all falls down…I’ve got you Call of Duty

Awakening Call of Duty

Always Wanting Touch Hazbin Hotel

Someone You Can Bet On Hazbin Hotel


Yet Another Test Hazbin Hotel


Mysterious Creatures Torchwood

Disentangling The Owl House

Knowing How Much You Want Me Gyakuten Saiban | Ace Attorney

A Damn Good Day Prodigal Son

Living Spaces Teen Wolf

Untitled Prodigal Son

So today was PT. I was a bit of a snarky ass on the forms. 'goal for PT' - to get my insurance to PAY for my MRI (and balance/leg strengthening) Even she was appalled by the fact I get 20 PT visits a year (not per injury which Mom keeps insisting on. I'm like NO) and I will need 12 of them to get the MRI approved leaving me nothing much if I need surgery (I won't do it this year for many reasons, this is one of them) I explain the injury, the thought this is neurogenic claudication, that my muscles are tight AF and we do the stretches they want. I can do them all with ease but one. So...here goes 6 weeks of barely needed (I could literally do this crap at home and some of them I DO)

Before PT I went to the coffee house. I had gone on Saturday too and the german chocolate cake latte was divine. The ice matcha latte with house made elderberry cold foam sounded yummy but tasted a bit too much like latte and needed sweetening. The elderberry foam was neat and it was pretty but I won't get it again. I'm learning NO iced lattes for me. Heated milk I can digest with lactaid but cold milk is a problem.

I also ran into a student of mine who I wrote a letter of rec for a while back. Turns out she got a job starting next month...in Pittsburgh so I was trying to help her with things to do and where to look to live (the work told her Monroeville and I agreed with where she'll be working, don't want to live where my parents do and suck up Green Tree hill every day).

And my day started with calls to the insurance who COULD NOT tell me if they would pay for this PT clinic. They couldn't be sure of it. Nor could they tell me if they would pay for continuous glucose monitors. HOW do you not know? I'm like there's no way you know if you'll pay for gene testing right? Nope. I hate this insurance.


Let's continue with the Music Monday Alphabet theme with sharing songs that begin with a certain letter. Feel free to chime in with your favorite song(s) that follow the weekly letter. Hit me with your faves. This week's letter is Q (and I haven't even listened to your suggestions from last two weeks but we all know why. Keep those songs flowing)

there are so few I know and like that fit this I'm not even cutting it




Only including this one because it's not another 'queen' song and I remember my parents listening to it (and Quando is Italian for when)

now this one I truly loved back in the day

when the neurologist says I'm sorry and I feel so bad for you. How are you doing this? I'm like it's fine, I already know I have arthritis and diabetic neuropathy and I suspect I have a radiculopathy on the left, spinal stenosis and I severed the nerves in my right leg.

Well you're right. NONE of the nerves work below my knee on the right. none of them. Thank god it's just sensory and not motor. I have stenosis. I have the radiculopathy. I also have a bad disk l4-l5.

So she's like what do you want for pain? Um nothing. Thanks. If you think this is painful, you literally have no idea what the rest of my body is like. This is nothing. Give me some PT in January and it's all good. Just tell me do I have a shot to slow down the nerve death progression. Well I can't take lyrica/neurontin (and they're not great drugs. I almost never prescribed them myself.) But really it's not particularly painful, more numb than anything.

Tomorrow I see the ortho for my hip which actually does hurt. She wants an update on that. No problem. Really the only big pain I have is over my sacrum from sitting so much. My students are like sit down we'll get it. You don't understand. Sitting is the only thing that hurts. I'm fine if I'm up and moving. Movement is medicine in its own way. It improves the fit of the cartilage and decreases the arthritis pain, the more you sit the worse it'll get, the cartilage literally disintegrates faster Hell that was on your test a couple weeks ago...

SHockingly they did stay for the lab review for next weeks practical. Well about 6 students per class. I SHOULD have had 40 students today. 12 showed up. I had one miss a different class but was in another class today so when she tells me she was ill and that's why she didn't turn her paper in, that ain't flying.

Came home put up another chapter of my whumptober story only to find ch 4 had entirely disappeared. I'm pretty annoyed by that. You can find Digging Up Bones here.

She went the loss and gear too, as keenly as Grace. - The most incomprehensible thing I've typed in a while. I'm pretty sure I mean she felt the loss and fear....

SNippet - The astringent odor of cleaners made Alessia’s headache as they walked down the hall. Vivian stayed with them but detoured to the nurse’s station. Javier left them at the hospital, going back to do more research. That was far more important than them all sitting in Dan’s tiny room.

Alessia applied the brakes when she entered the room and Grace careened into her. Not only was Mr. Abadiano in the room so was Efrem, Dan’s older brother. Alessia recognized him from pictures. The beautiful older woman looked vaguely familiar but Alessia couldn’t place her.

“Oh, sorry we don’t mean to intrude,” Grace said.

“Nonsense. Come in. They won’t let you stay long,” Mr. Abadiano said, crossing over to them. He took their hands. “Are you two okay?”

“We’re fine, sir,” Alessia said.

“I heard you two banished the demon.” Efrem pushed off the wall he’d been standing against. “You kept it from killing Danilo. Thank you.”

“I wish we had been fast enough to stop it in the first place. Dan shouldn’t be in that bed,” Alessia replied.

36258 / 50000 words. 73% done!

You are complicated and I don't know where to start. If I had gone in as planned (I had the appt before the fall) they could compare the left leg (with the numb foot) to the right but now we can't. SHe was poking me with a safety pin and I couldn't even feel her touching me.

So nerve conduction test on monday and they're fighting the insurance for MRI rights and we go for there but I'm definitely NOT imagining this shit


the good news is Malcolm peed in the box last night but today he wants nothing to do with being inside. This was another fear of mine that he wanted to be in and out (I can't have him do that when I take him home) but he is unneutered and whatever it was outside today he had to be there. In the rain.

Sigh. Beginning to think this isn't going to work.

I woke up with every part of my spine hurting and then I sliced open the inside of my cheek. I then had a four hour meeting online. I will have to do social distancing in my classroom which makes it impossible to hold some of my classes and labs. I'll have to come up with hybrid courses online and face to face. And that's IF we can be in class. If not, I have to make it ALL online. I am going to have to record a lot of my classes and I have a new template for my online classes. It will be needed for my one class that will always been online. I have a lot of work to do.

And I've been nauseated for over 24 hours now. Every time I eat it gets worse. Beginning to wonder if I have a stupid ulcer again.

And then my sugar dropped AND a tornado was sighted within 30 miles and I had to sit in the tub eating peanut butter with a pillow on my head. The storm at least has passed.

THANKS for the help with my Buffyverse conundrum. Kiramaru is right, talking it out helps me (ELD will attest to that). It's the annoying part of my process. Even if I don't take your advice I will get something out of it trust me.

"Your MRI revealed a constellation of problems" Yeah that's what I wanted to hear. Thanks, Doc. So in short, degenerative joint disease in my lumbar spine (but no stenosis so that's a plus), Femoroacetabular Impingement, acetabular labrum degeneration, Meralgia paresthetica, gluteus medius & gluteus minimus tendionpathy (that's right I has ASS tendonitis. SHUT IT!) and a torn hamstring all on the right hip. The good news is I don't need surgery, just some injections and PT and he does not want me starting that exercise regime I was thinking of. I'm not sure WHAT is making all my damn tendons tear other than diabetes, femaleness and age.

It snowed on the solar panel on my sad little string of lights which is in part why I'm still here. Tomorrow will be a better driving day and I needed more time to pack etc

But I didn't clean. And I know I overbought but really WHY is there so many fucking bags? I took home stuff over Thanksgiving.I'll be lucky to squash all this in the car. It was a reality check. You can't even tell I took this stuff out of here. I do not want to move again. Scary.

I feel like I'm trying to catch my own tail. Thankfully I remembered today that mom and dad don't have an updated Word program because all the new lectures I just downloaded for the new class won't open so I'm trying to resave them. And pay bills and edit. And explode.

I got a pound of the best brisket from Rowdy's to go home with me tomorrow. YUM! And I went to Arch and Eddie's for a goodbye burger and beer. I went local, got Jackie O's barking pumpkin. Not really a pumpkin taste and OMG it was nearly 7$ for the glass. So much for supporting my local team.

Talked to my brother. He wants to learn to meditate to help with his issues (Both he and his wife have serious autoimmune diseases as I've mentioned!) Oh I meditate. Want me to sign you up with my online sources? No I have a book. Hey I downloaded several, I'll send them to you. No, I have a book. Fine, I've only been doing this for years. Bite me. Go meditate wrong.

I have yet to edit anything. I can't come up with a title. WHY are titles so hard. It makes me sad.

And my good deed for the day: Holiday cards for young arson survivor

Not much to say other than it really is true you can't please everyone...or anyone sometimes. Now that I have Blood Red Roulette done I'm worried about it. Luc might be TOO down on himself. For example, the one and only non-friend review of Soldiers of the Sun was upset that Temple was 'wallowing' in the loss of his lover, Li and was emotionally flat. If there was ANYTHING I was convinced of, it was that Temple's emotions were spot on. That's a punch to the face (this is why you don't read your reviews). Another for last year's Christmas story said there was NO romance in it. To me, if my partner had done what these characters did for each other, it would be the most romantic thing in the world.

Maybe I would feel less worried if Soldiers of the Sun hadn't be so totally ignored (except for the one person who hated it, of course). It's very easy to feel 'what the hell am I do?' and 'I suck,' when it comes to this game. It's easy to see why people quit.

Why is it that you can make a dish for yourself 101 times and it's perfect every time but you make it for guests it turns to shit? I made my 13 bean soup to take home. The salt pork didn't smell bad when I cut it up. It looked fine. It was freshly bought. Once the stuff got hot there was this sour reek. I pulled out some tomatoes wondering if it was acid on metal but no, they smelled okay. I pulled a hunk of the pork out and it smelled. I got most of it out of the soup but when you have a huge crock pot filled with veggies and 2 cups of beans it's not easy to dig out chunks of stuff. I spent the entire evening diddling with this to get the sour out. I had some just to be sure I wasn't going to poison everyone because seriously there should be NO reason for it to be bad. I feel okay. Pissed though.

I want to divorce the right side of my body. The arthritis today is miserable. I think because it was 70 like two days ago and today it snowed. I dont' do well with temp jumps. My shoulder particularly hurts. I swear if I need another tendon repair I will scream. I didn't get much of anything including writing done.

And my insurance sent me a letter believing someone else should be responsible for my treatment for a certain thing. What thing? No clue. They just said it was on 10/1. Um yeah thanks helpful.Not what was treated or where. I'm assuming it's my PT but really? Thanks for being clear and thanks for giving me all the paperwork to put the bill on someone else without telling me what it IS.

A friend said I needed this I can not see myself carting Kanda around in this.

Glitter beards! Ah hipsters.

I hadn't been to that in Jackson in years. I heard about it on the radio yesterday just as I was about to go to Jackson to the library. I decided to go today instead. Now I remember why I don't go. Someone needs to tell Jackson that there are other crafts other than country. That's all that was there mostly country and food. I had cashed my royalty check, pathetic as it was, to go to this. Luckily I walked away with 80% of it. I got a chocolate bar chunky with espresso beans and a necklace. There was one actual painter there with really nice art. You can find their work at Art Ecko on FB and here's what I got, Except I got it as a pendant I'm fond of it.

There were a few other things I considered but the cheap, cute snowman painted on a wooden spoon had chipped paint. Hell I could do that so eh. There was one woman with SO much stuff it was impossible to see it all. She had old turn of the century photos with earrings jammed into them. It was interesting but they were so large it felt off. Too many people had bought crap like this was a flea market for chinese crap.

Oh well, it was good to at least support the town's attempts at art. I've yet to get to the newly restored theater (mostly because they keep booking music I don't want to pay 15$ to hear).

Other than that I spent the whole day on the couch on a heating pad watching an Archer marathon and writing because my back was killing me. The heating pad helped. I didn't get as much written as I wanted to. I want to do more. SPeaking of Archer, this is the show that makes me think I'm going to hell for enjoying it since it is rude in so many ways.

I'll be back with that thought later and a word count. ETA here it is. Didn't write as much as I had hoped.

Here's some snippets I have that go toward my bingo prompt card.

Prompt - Enjoy Nature - (Kaleo is at a lake at one of Aneurin's many properties) It was so beautiful here and quiet. Kaleo breathed in deep in spite of the vague stab of pain in his chest from the cold. The spicy scent of those still-green tress filled his senses.

It almost made his eyes water with a burst of pure joy. His friends would be amazed that he was someplace as glorious as this. Places like this existed only in fiction as far as slum dwellers were concerned. Even the snow didn't take away the joy he felt, nor the ache in his fingers from the chill. At least his toes were toasty in the boots he had borrowed.

Soft winds of wind and birds played out like music over the water. Some small fuzzy creature he didn't know sat in a branch above him, scolding him in a high pitched chittering.

Prompt - Caught in Bed Together - (Kaleo and Aneurin are having fun on the living room lounger) “There's a woman watching us,” Kaleo whispered. “I think it's your mom.”

“Mom isn't due...”

Kaleo put his hand over Aneurin's mouth. “It's Mom.”

Aneurin squirmed out from under Kaleo, hiking himself up on his elbow. He peered over the back of the lounger. A sheepish expression flashed over his face as Aneurin gave a little wave. “Hi, Mom. You're early.”

“I'm regretting that now.”


Prompt Nurture Self-Worth : (Arrigo and Luc are coming off a fight with Eleni where Luc went on the offensive for once) it’s like hunting gators. You put the bait out there then you got to be faster than a top predator who's been around since the dawn of time.” Luc smiled.

“I can't argue that. Get some sleep. You still have a lot of healing to do.”

“Yeah.” Luc spooned up with Arrigo. Disappointed, sore, there was one thing he took away from tonight: he could stand up to Eleni. Knowing that changed things for him. There would be another time and while he didn't look forward to it, Luc felt better about it than ever before. It was a happy thought to fall asleep to.


And happy birthday aaronlisa