Today it hit

[cornerofmadness]

I knew the depression would come. I was expecting it sooner than this. Also I'm furious on top of depressed. The online question editor I used to make my exams insisted on feedback for the questions. It's SHOWING the feedback on the questions. So basically it's giving them the answer and I can't stop it now because some students have already taken these exams. Head desk. There's been too much time invested and the students would have to retake it and the weird thing is they're not getting 100% so I'm just letting it ride.

I feel like crap between allergies and my stomach but at least I know that's what it is and not something more serious.

Well I won't have to worry about if the new bonsai was going to be okay. The winds ripped it right out of the pot and I have no idea where it is now.

I'm starting to worry now, mostly when I'm trying to sleep and can't. More for my brother and SiL (who are both back working in health care) for my cousins who are nurses, for my aged parents.

Dealing with my own feelings of guilty but I can't codify them yet.

I'm sad Joe Diffe died of this. I loved his music.

I'm furious that Trump is tweeting about his ratings. People. Are. Dying. and he's concerned that people think he's doing good. And who the fuck thinks this?

I'm furious that there isn't enough equipment. And if ANY part of what the govs of IL, NY, MI and WA are saying about them being denied equipment while Trump supporters like FL ARE getting the equipment plus more...I don't even know what I want to have happen. Something. I don't know if that's true. It's in the Washington Post for what that's worth. I DO know Trump has tweeted derogatory shit about MI's gov calling her 'that woman' or 'Half Whit' Which seriously if you're okay with this I just can't with you any more.

And in the middle of this we have the Mashpee tribe being stripped of their federal reservation status because they're trying to build a casino that would compete with Trump's.