irate ramblings

[cornerofmadness]

Dear Crime Drama Writers
Please understand that people who like crime dramas tend to watch MORE than just one. The fact that this week's NCIS and next week's Law and Order: Criminal Intent are exactly the same right down to the man radioactively poisoned man walking into the office and stopped at the lead detective's desk and says "I want you to solve a murder (dramatic pause) mine" just sucks. I mean seriously. Do you think we'll forget by next week. Do you think we only watch ONE of these things? Is it going to show up on CSI the week after next? This total reusing of the SAME FREAKING PLOT that's been going on for the last few years is very tiring. It puts you only one step up from this next dumb ass

Dear Mr. Gray baby SUV

It's pea soup fog out this morning so bad so that 18 wheeler headlights can't be seen and that piercing flashing light on the back of school buses nearly invisible so by all means a) drive without your lights b) ride right up on my ass at the stop sign like that will make me NOT stop. c) by all means DON'T stop and cut off an 18 wheeler doing it then cross the double yellow and slide between me and a school bus to go tearing off down the road to WHERE buddy? that road is 10 miles of nothing until you hit Gallipolis.
d) oh and someone has written 'cockwagon' in the dirt on your back window. Did you know? Or are you advertising?


There was a highlight mind you today. Called grandma because she's 91 and my mom and dad are in FL so I figure I'd make sure she's all right and hasn't killed their cat. I hit it right since my uncle and aunt were there too (i.e. she won't be on the phone bitching at me all night). Oh hi Valerie (no, that's not me. I don't even bother any more. Gram had a favorite daughter and that daughter had her favorite grandkids. My brother, mother and I have been answering to their names all our lives). she proceeds to tell me she likes the cat except when its hungry because it gets on the bed and head butts her in the skull until she gets up and feeds it. I'm highly amused.

then remembered, oh darn, tomorrow is the appt with the ob/gyn. So the frantic shaving of legs and pumicing of feet (as if I could erase months of neglect in a night and who is even looking at them) I am SO glad I found a lonely tube of udder cream because the only dry patches of skin on me are the tops of my thighs and inner knees and I really didn't want to have to explain why they smelled like chocolate, mango or margarita...which are the only other scents I have here. (note to self, find other lotions to avoid eating off your own fingers at bed time)

remenant of nightmare #3 - all I remember was being trapped in an attic with this young psycho man who was MORE afraid of who was coming up the attic stairs (trapping us) than he was of me and i had put out his eye with a bottle brush AND stabbed him in the chest with a shovel.