Writerly Ways

[cornerofmadness]

If you want a distraction from the stress out there, can you help me out? I need to write a blurb for my novella. I have this as the long-version blurb. See what you think. Critiques welcome. Thank you.

Santino Bellomi and his work partner, Cam, are sent to Cassadaga, Florida by the Aspida Pneumva, a group of psychics and mages. They have to rescue a nixie from a polluted lake and while they’re there, they decide to check out the town, which is known for its psychics. New recruits to the Aspida are always welcome and where better than a spiritualist town to hunt for them? What Santino hopes for more, however, is to get down with the assignment quickly. He isn’t a fan of heat and humidity and he’d looking forward to going on a well-earned vacation once this mission is over.

Ryan Doyle grew up in Cassadaga, where being a psychic runs in the family. His sister hates that he’s still in town ‘stealing her clients.’ Ryan has never roamed far from home but he had gotten restless lately. It’s hard being a gay, geek, wanna-be urban fantasy author living in small town Florida, many miles from the nearest beach. He does enjoy his job as one of the town psychics even if things are fairly routine. That is until he meets someone new. Ryan has never met anyone with a psychic shield so strong until Santino sits down for a reading. He thought they were potentially pure myth. Intrigued, he asks Santino out even though Santino is as secretive as he is fun.

Santino hopes to win Ryan over both for himself and for the Aspida, which could always use another strong psychic. He’s hoping his skills in the kitchen might just swing the balance in his favor. Ryan has almost given up on love being a gay geek living in rural Florida in a town where most of the population is twice his age, but can a seductive tourist be the answer to his dreams? Things never run smoothly for those in the Aspida. What should have been a simple rescue mission is plagued by mosquitoes, enraged ghosts and someone or something draining residents of their life force. Ryan’s first foray into adventure might be his last.


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Comments

[alexseanchai]

how long, at most, do you want the blurb to be?

[cornerofmadness]

If I remember right, one has to be under 500 words (this is 343)

One will have to be under 300 words and one will have to be twitter length but I let the publisher worry on those last two

[thenewbuzwuzz]

Okay, "he'd looking forward" should be "he's looking forward", and maybe "get down with the assignment" was supposed to be "get done with the assignment"?

Personally, I'd say the "gay, geek" and "gay geek" bits about Ryan feel kind of repetitive. Maybe it would be enough to use that specific phrase once?

[cornerofmadness]

thank you! Much appreciated