Beginning to wonder about my memory

[cornerofmadness]

Okay yes I test in the 95% percentile for memory BUT if you let me function in the real world my memory fails. Is it part of my depression? the ADHD? who the hell knows. Mom woke me up this morning to tell me my passport is at home. SOOOO my memory of putting that in my suitcase was real. I must have done it at spring break and took it there knowing I'd be flying out of Pittsburgh (because in theory they were thinking about joining me). I'm glad I know where it is but I have no memory of taking it there other than a vague one....

I did get the bathroom floor scrubbed today and the story edits on my solarpunk story finished....and that's it. My god, where does time go?

I did leave here are 330 to go to work to take two plants to the greenhouse and clean up my lab practical. This should have taken 10-15 minutes. It took an HOUR. So I was late in getting to the winery. I didn't really want to go but L wanted to celebrate closing on the house she was selling and I was the only one around. Okay. fine. At least there was pizza and good pizza.

I still don't have my Roswell reservations or Santa Fe. The latter is I wanted to stay at a silly alien themed one but mom is like are you sure? No....I google earthed it and I'm like you know what that hotel is across from totally sus buildings. Yeah let's go with the Day's Inn or some shit closer to the museum's anyhow (and wow Google Earth makes this place look ugly. granted I already knew I didn't like the desert. Not my thing)

Santa Fe needs me to call and be sure that parking isn't five blocks away or something.

Here's the friday fandom round up

I've started my 5 story series for Hunter in The Owl House here: Year One

Sweetly Singing FAKE

Police at the Door 9-1-1

Are You Ready for a Brand New Beat? Angel the series art

Not Himself Torchwood

Too Good to Pass Up 9-1-1

From the Ruins stranger Things

Wine Tasting Harry Potter

Date on a Calendar Harry Potter

Days of Future Past Buffy the Vampire Slayer ch 3 wip

Sleeping Arrangements Stargate Atlantis

Comments

Well ...

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> Okay yes I test in the 95% percentile for memory BUT if you let me function in the real world my memory fails. Is it part of my depression? the ADHD? who the hell knows. <<

There are many different types of memory, and one can be damaged while others work fine. So for instance, narrative memory is your recollection of events, your personal experience, in sequence -- your life story. Declarative memory is data storage of facts and such. Some areas that can be affected by depression or ADHD are things like procedural memory (doing tasks without having to concentrate on each step) and short-term memory (keeping track of a disposable fact just long enough to use it). Both of those conditions can mess with executive functions in general, the things your mind is supposed to do to keep things organized.

Most memory tests are checking declarative memory, your ability to use facts. The tests for other types of memory tend to be reserved for checking brain function like if someone has a head injury or to see if someone has dementia. So if you haven't done a memory test with subsections for different parts of memory, then a high declarative memory can obscure problems with other types of memory.

Re: Well ...

[cornerofmadness]

true. This is what I teach in my neurophysiology class (But also know someone would ask about the test). I am split between is it the depression which is absolutely run away at this point or the ADHD that is worsening as I age

Re: Well ...

[ysabetwordsmith]

It could be either, or even both. However, they do tend to manifest differently. Depression-related memory issues tend to be based on "brain fog" and/or difficulty with more advanced cognitive functions because it's just too hard to do that much work with that few spoons. This type often gets worse later in the day as energy runs low, especially the pattern of "too much day left at the end of the spoons." Conversely, ADHD-related memory issues tend to have a distracted or scattered pattern, where the mind skips over or misses some bits. This type often gets worse in busy, distracting environment. It may be less bothersome in a quiet environment. Both types can be exacerbated by stress, which can make it harder to distinguish between them.

Some people find that drugs greatly improve their performance and reduce symptoms, for both depression and ADHD. Other people find that drugs make them feel like zombies -- and not all of those side effects necessarily fade after stopping the drugs. :/

Re: Well ...

[cornerofmadness]

yeah and I have symptoms of both (and I'm highly allergic to a lot of depression meds so I'm on none at the moment) But at the moment I think the ADHD is leading the way

Re: Well ...

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> yeah and I have symptoms of both <<

If both fit, then probably both are influencing your memory.

>> (and I'm highly allergic to a lot of depression meds so I'm on none at the moment) <<

That sucks. My sympathies; many drugs made for humans don't work as advertised for me.

>> But at the moment I think the ADHD is leading the way <<

Some people find non-drug remedies or lifestyle changes helpful. Others don't have the energy to try different things until they find some that work.

For ADHD, cognitive offloading is often helpful -- using tools to assist memory so you don't have to do it all in your head. Me, I keep a kitchen timer on my desk to remind me of doing something a while later, so I don't have to waste effort remembering it and can use that energy for something else like writing. Most people nowadays prefer phone apps, and there are tons of those for everything from mood-boosting to task-managing.

For depression, there are lots of things that can help, and if you stack them together, it adds up. Not always enough to solve the problem, but it can make life suck somewhat less. Two standard ones are activity and nature. But there's a fascinating addition, which is that the more different types of birdsong in the air, the more positive effect on people's mental state. So if you're already planning to go out for a walk, or even just sit outside, aiming for a park with water and the most diverse birds should maximize the benefit. Come to think of it, many people with ADHD find that time in nature helps their brain stop running around like a ferret on crack.

Diet is generally worth checking for mind/body issues in general, since the modern foodstream is inferior and many problems can occur from a lack of certain nutrients. Plus of course, good food is self-care and helps buffer mood. You can look up mood-boosting foods or calming foods or whatever, but it's hard to go wrong with fresh whole foods in any case.

Solutions like these are readily found online, or occasionally in magazines -- I found the bird one in a magazine and looked it up for online links -- but not necessarily mentioned by official caregivers since they don't get paid for that stuff like they get paid for drugs. I know a lot of folks who poke around with this stuff on their own because official help is just not very helpful. Up to you if it seems worth pursuing in your case.

Re: Well ...

[cornerofmadness]

I do what I can with food because of the serious issues I have with them and my meds

that birdsong one is interesting.t hat is one i have not tried, thanks

Re: Well ...

[ysabetwordsmith]

>> I do what I can with food because of the serious issues I have with them and my meds <<

Good idea.

I have found that healthy food is, if nothing else, a delicious form of self-care. Most of my comfort foods are things like fresh fruit or yogurt. Madras lentils is a good option when I want something hot. I like exploring the functions of food, what things are uplifting or soothing or good for repairing injuries.

>> that birdsong one is interesting.t hat is one i have not tried, thanks <<

I'm happy I could help. People have known for a long time that nature is helpful, but "birdsong is dose-sensitive based on species diversity" is a new detail that's easy to apply. So I thought about it, and I suspect that it's because a habitat which attracts many different birds is usually a good habitat in general. Humans and birds like a lot of the same things -- fresh air, clean water, a mix of trees and open spaces. Thus a habitat good for many birds is also good for people, and our subconscious survival instincts equate "lots of birds singing" with "good and safe."

[spikedluv]

Again, I'm so glad you found your passport!

Such a pain making reservations sight unseen. So many times we've arrived someplace and figured out it was not the best option. Other times, we keep staying at the same place because it's perfect. Go figure.

[cornerofmadness]

Thanks.

You know at least Google Earth is helping because seriously I would have booked that one hotel without hesitation based on reviews but seeing GE's pictures with the trailer park and vast rows of dumpsters...

Then again you never know, right? You're like MOST Holiday Inns are okay and then you get there and it looks like ass and smells like it too