Writerly Ways

[cornerofmadness]

this is less of a writing blog and more of a question for everyone. How do you write what could be a negative (but important to the character) without being utterly offensive. Yes, I know you can't avoid offending everyone but on the other hand you CAN offend the many if you do things wrong.

What brought this up is this book i'm reading The Crossing Places by Elly Griffiths. Someone recced this mystery to me (Can't remember if it was here or elsewhere) and while I like the mystery part, Ruth, the main character absolutely has me THIS close to quitting the book. (which will suck since it fits one of my popsugar prompts and I paid full price for this thing)

I'm overweight, by a lot. I do not like this about myself. On the other hand I'm not always thinking about this. I dress however I please for myself. Would I change this? Yes I'm working on it (and yes there are a subset of overweight people who find that alone offensive. I've run into that).

Anyhow Ruth in chapter 1 is talking about wearing only black because she's fat. Okay in the 90s and early 00s (this was pubbed in 09) that WAS the rec for overweight women. Wear black it's slimming. Uh huh. In ch 2, she is paranoid about getting into the car with the detective because what if the seatbelt won't go around her (I have never had this fear, in an airplane, yes, car no), images a siren blurting out from the seat giving away how fat she is. in ch 3, the detective is thinking about how fat she is, how she can barely do her job because she can't walk to the site (she's a field archaeologist) and how horrified his wife would be at how fat she is. ch 4 has her being picked up in a police car and she images it's for the crime of being single and fat. Thankfully the next few chapters don't mention her weight but....


So how fat is she? 12 stone. For the Americans of the group that's 168 pounds. Let that sink in. This woman is barely 30 pounds overweight. I thought she was going to be the size of someone who might have a weight-based show on TLC, my 600 pound life or something. I was put in mind of my friend at work and her struggles (she is in that weight range). ALL THIS FUSS and she's 30 pounds overweight. I'm literally 100 pounds more than here and I can still hike a few yards without breathing hard. Never have I worried I'm too fat for a car seat.

It made me a) want to not read this book b) wonder how to make a character unhappy with their physical appearance without being horrendously fatphobic or ableist etc etc

How do/would you handle it? I think in some ways I do a decent job of it (points to story in yesterday's post) For example while it's not really in the canon, it is in Viv's notes and is a huge part of fanon. Angel Dust hates his feet. I'd like to think I did a decent job of depicting that without being obnoxious or insulting.

There has to be a happy medium, right?

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Comments

[shipperslist]

So how fat is she? 12 stone.
I converted that, then stared at the number, converted the pounds you gave, and then stared at that number, too. That's 76kg. THAT IS NOT FAT. I'm well over 100kg and I don't agonize over getting into a car or worrying about the seatbelts. I haven't done that in an airplane either.

That said. If I wanted a NORMAL WEIGHT person agonize about their fatness, I'd probably make it clear they have a distorted body image, body dysmorphia, mental health issues, eating disorder, that sort of stuff--something that would explain the completely wrong image they have about themselves. (I actually have written an anorexia story and got positive feedback on that. I'm proud of it, even though my ED is on the bulimia/BED side instead of anorexia)

ANyhoo. I'd write with respect and understanding while making it clear how skewered their perception was.

[dr_zook]

If I wanted a NORMAL WEIGHT person agonize about their fatness, I'd probably make it clear they have a distorted body image, body dysmorphia, mental health issues, eating disorder, that sort of stuff--something that would explain the completely wrong image they have about themselves.

This!! What the hell was wrong with the author? =/

[cornerofmadness]

I'm going with the author is fat phobic because it's one thing for a character to have a bad body image but it's another where EVERYONE else comments about how much of a whale she is when she's barely overweight

[cornerofmadness]

Yeah depending on height, she's at best 30-40 pounds overweight. Like you I'm over 100Kg (around 120 give or take a few kgs)

I HAVE been on airplanes where the seat and seatbelt are too small because they're getting ridiculous on planes but never a car and again I can walk just fine thank you. I hike all over the damn place.

You know I could accept it if she had body dysmorphia and it was all internalized fat phobia. That's a real thing but everyone around her also acts like she's 250 Kg and that's what's making me think about how to do this without being THIS offensive.

Thankfully now that the mystery is rolling I haven't heard about her weight since (she's still a miserable sot)

Glad your story got positive reviews. It's certainly not an easy subject to broach

[spikedluv]

*raises hand* You might have heard about the series from me. I don't recall if I mentioned the weight thing in my comments, but I also find it ridiculous. Especially when, as in this case, the woman isn't very large at all. (I'm reading a cozy mystery series where I got annoyed in one book because it sounded like the author/characters were fat-shaming/blaming the victim for his own death because of his weight, which really annoyed me.)

I can't recall if the weight thing continued in other books, but I tend to think not as I would probably have gotten pretty sick of it, enough to remember, even if I did continue to read it.

[cornerofmadness]

that's possible, you're one of the biggest mystery readers on my list.

OMG no, I couldn't read one where they're blaming the victim's death on his weight, geez. I can maybe excuse Ruth because body dysmorphia exists but Nelson has the same thoughts (then again, he's an asshole)


I'm fairly sure I don't like Ruth enough to want to read more

[spikedluv]

I'm sorry to hear that since I enjoyed the series so much.

[cornerofmadness]

I do like the mystery part. I want to slap Ruth (also it's not too uncommon to not like things friends like, odd really) I love her job and the setting. I would look for more at a library I suppose

[justphoenix]

You showed a lot more restraint than I did with that book. I would have thrown it across the room!


To answer your question: it depends? I used to worry a lot about writing characters that were offensive or stereotypical, but now my approach is to just write the story and figure out if it's problematic later.
For a character to be offensive enough that it turns me off on the book depends on how much pull the character has on me and how much the offensive behavior appears. Eleanor Oliphant was incredibly fatphobic, but it fit with her judgy character and her story was interesting enough otherwise to keep me reading. And she didn't go on about it, she just silently judged them, while the various fat people in the story went about their (very normal) business. Contrast this The Seven Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle, where Lord Ravencourt's obesity is harped on for pages and pages and pages. I liked Seven Deaths-the writing was excellent, and it was an imaginative premise, but I had to DNF for that reason.

[cornerofmadness]

I often feel like you do, it depends. FINALLY now that the mystery is rolling the fat phobia is dying off. And it would be one thing if it was just the main character's body dysmorphia. I mean that's a real thing. But other characters thinking the same thing about a character that's barely overweight. Ugh