sigh

[cornerofmadness]

well after seeing mjules post about procrastinating on things best not left undone I hit the job board...still seeing precious little of interest except for this one...my alma mater Uni of Central Florida is opening a MEDICAL school and is looking for profs with my qualifications...the ad is dated 2/19. They say they started interviewing in 2/12 (you know before the ad went up) now i've checked that job board every week and that ad was NOT there. Mom checked the board and she woudl have seen that too. I might still apply even though I don't WANT to return to Orlando all that much. Still, medical school students!!

Then I accidentally let slip that there was a job I'm well suited for in East Liverpool which is less than an hour away from home. I do NOT like this place (still Ohio none the less) yes this is a Kent State branch campus but EL is a pit. My mom called twice to insist I apply. My dad called and did the same and then my brother (since mom told everyone). I just did the research on the stats. ave salary is 21K for men, 18K for women, over a third of the population is below the poverty line. in the last 7 years there's been more than 60 rapes and there's over 300 registered sex offenders in a town of 13,000. I think i'm justified in NOT going there. i don't care that the family wants me closer.

I don't know what it is about returning 'home.' Most people would call it full circle. Many would see it as the right, good thing to do. For me...it feels like defeat and I couldn't tell you why. The university of Wisconsin branch has a spot that would be great...only it's so far north that I don't want it. Sigh. I know that I might not get my dream job but i would like to leave here (which really isn't a bad job, it really isn't) for something I think would make me happy rather than, huh...maybe it'll be okay. It's depressing.

And then I managed to burn myself badly today. I heard the soup bumping so I went to get it off the stove. What I didn't realize was that i had the wrong burner on (the bumping was caused by the convection heat). Not only that the metal handle was OVER the burner that was on. I grabbed it and fried myself. Got second degree burns over my thumb and palm and the skin is blistered nad hanging off the index finger (which can't even straighten). In a word. Ouch.

Comments

[bashipforever.livejournal.com]

ouch on the burn. That sounds like it hurts a lot. I hope it feels better soon.

And good luck on the job. I don't blame you for not wanting to go to EL. It sounds like a pit.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

it is and has been for years

and thanks

[purple-smurf.livejournal.com]

The first job sounds like something you'd love, even if it isn't in the ideal location. The second does not so much. You are very much justified in NOT going there!! That is more than a little scary, no matter what your family says.

And completely understand on the defeat subject. Completely.

The burn sounds hurtful! Aloe vera may not help with that one.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i'm putting aloe on it anyhow

but yeah the job sucks and i just...this is depressing the hell out of me

[masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com]

That place sounds awful on its own merits. Don't go!

One reason I think I can move near my parents and it's OK is I believe I can do that without losing myself to them. There are so many things where I'm going that would make life better for me, allow me to live my life the way I'm already used to living. So I made the choice to move before I even informed my parents about it.

But I am aware that there will be a certain pressure from them. I had the same experience when I moved to SF where, by coincidence, my older sister already lived. I didn't move here to be near her; she was quite bossy with me growing up and imagined herself my mother, but I have lived here nearly eight years without that being a problem. It's all about creating the right boundaries and sticking by them.

But yeah, if there's no advantages for you living in an area near them, don't f***ing go!

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

at least not in THAT area. if it were in Pittsbrugh I'd do it merely because then i could visit and NOT have to spend the week. because i live close by

but i refuse to take a crap job just to be closer.

[silvrethorn.livejournal.com]

UCF's been very aggressive about growing and improving. It might be a nice change from a stagnant campus with limited funding--if you don't like what you're doing today, there's likely to be a whole new department added tomorrow that you could transfer into. And there are businesses and industries there that are likely to fund chairs, especially in the medical and biotech fields (think all those acres of retirees needing miracle cures). There's no helping the weather, the traffic, or the screwed-up excuse for urban planning they do in that town, but at least it's the devil you know, having lived in the area for several years. Whether UCF is offering a living wage is a whole other question, of course. 18K is an insult. Maybe you can live on that in Ohio, but Orlando is way pricier than that.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

well i'd be making about 45K but still, the local blows.

I'm considering UCF because it's a m edical schoo and for no other reason. I know i won't make enough there to comfortable live and that's what sucks

[silvrethorn.livejournal.com]

You need to find a way to get back to Madison. It was just voted #1 Most Walker-Friendly City. Maybe you could actually get healthy there--I can't imagine where you would find to walk where you are now, and you know Orlando isn't even pedestrian-safe, never mind walker-friendly.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i'm trying to find my way back there. I really am but there's just not many colleges outside of U of W which i'm not qualified to teach at.

[0-mother-0.livejournal.com]

East Liverpool sounds awful.

And "Aii-Chihuahua!" regarding the burns. *cringes*

Hope it's all better, sooner :)

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

it does but gah it's FL. I hate FL

the hand hurts

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

Florida

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

yes, reason 1001 never to return there

[sita-137.livejournal.com]

Well, if you do come back down here, we'll bug you mercilessly.

And I'd love to leave home. I've been here for almost 20 years. It contributes to a "what the hell am I doing with my life" feeling. So I do understand.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i'm sure of that.

and yes it's like I like my independence and I resent this pressure to come home. Even for break that starts tomorrow, i resent the three weeks of browbeating until finally i said fine I'll be home. I'm actually hoping for pain and complications of for the root canal to bow out of this.

[sita-137.livejournal.com]

...Can't you just disconnect your phone?

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

they'd just email me

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

Ouch! Your poor hand.

I'm sorry that the job front isn't turning up better possibilities.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks. as you see i still need your b ubblewrap solution

and i know. the thing is there's less than 2000 professorial jobs period country wide and of them about 150 are in my field. The one bad thing about this job is that you can't just say hey I want to go back to Pittsburgh and get a job somewhere. its a waiting game

[lyricnonsense.livejournal.com]

Please don't move to East Liverpool. The place sounds terribly scary, and everyone probably would rather you be somewhere less dangerous.

Chin up about the whole job search; something fantastic will come up!

And lots of aloe and ice for your poor hand! I hope it heals quickly.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i plan on not moving there, trust me

and thanks on all accounts.

[ex-chaos-by-699.livejournal.com]

I had very strangely overprotective parents (they wouldn't let me out of the house except to go to school or the backyard) and I grew up wanting to get out of the house as soon as possible. And once I did, I never wanted to go back because I felt so oppressed there.

Obviously you didn't have the same experience, but I can certainly understand feeling like moving back home is a step backward.

I hope you find a good job in a decent place that's more to your liking. You need some good fortune in your life, and I think you could also use the amenities of a less remote area, not to mention less brain-dead students. Good luck.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks. I appreiciate it.

Yeah my parents were never that overprotective and my brother...he's never wanted to leave home nor does his wife. I mean it's not that i don't like doing things with family i just resent being ordered about