That Birthday story

[cornerofmadness]

Well if you ever wanted to see what a story of mine looks like in rough draft stage, here you go (and not to mention the spell checker crapped out totally. I had to do it by hand and I'm sure to have missed something)

This is just one chapter of a longer thing I'm writing for crazygirl mary's CD lyric challenge where you use all the lyrics of one CD. I'm doing The Cure's Distingeration cd.  The story is tentatively titled Leaning on the Edge of E and begins with the battle with Black Thorn and this is a MUCH later chapter. All you really need to know is no one died in the battle but Connor (who disobeyed Angel's orders to stay away) and Gunn were badly hurt. After Connor recovers he and Angel (and occasionally Spike and Illyria who are traveling together), go on a soul-searching trip across the globe, learning what it is to be father and son. I think you can figure out the rest from here.

I started this chapter for Maren but you'd know that neither Buffy nor Angel wanted to cooperate and be romantic. They hate doing that for me. Sigh. Sorry it didn't turn out as planned. Oh and since this chapter is already 11 pages long I'm assuming the Halloween party (which will be done as part of my OWN challenge) will be a seperate chapter. As a teaser Connor and Faith are dressing as Captain Jack Sparrow and Elizabeth Swann

Leaning on the Edge of E - Chapter Same Deep Water as You.

Let me know what you think and as always with my WIP's I'm open to suggestion.

Comments

[bashipforever.livejournal.com]

Dana I even love your WIPS. I thought the Buffy and Angel bit was good. Even though I do occasionally write future where Buffy and Angel just fall into each others arms, most of the time I prefer not to read it. They have serious issues they have to deal with before the get the Almost Perfect But Not Quite Happily Ever After.

I laughed out loud at Angel's Halloween "costume" can't wait to see Faith as Sparrow and Elizabeth, please tell me your gonna make Faith wear a corset just to hear her alternately bitch about not breathing but looking wicked sexy with the way her breasts gets pushed up.

I'd love to give suggestions, really but I think your completely on target here. Waiting anxiously for the rest

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

Thanks Kristi. Yeah I figure there needs to be talking between those two. I wanted there to be more of it but they refused to cooperate so I'm hoping this wasn't too bad.

Yes Faith will be wearing corset and gown because for once she wants to be girlie in spite of Buffy's reminding her what happened when Buffy tried that outfit...

You'll certainly be seeing the Halloween portion before long. The rest of the story,you know the whole BEGINNING might be longer in coming. Actually ch 1 is done and hey, only two pages long. Imagine that

[bashipforever.livejournal.com]

They do need to talk and I liked where you had them start. Buffy and Angel have a hard time discussing the important things so I think it's appropriate that they discuss them in short disjointed conversations. I think the scene worked. And never underestimate the power of Buffy and Angel talking about something without talking about something (you know how she never says what she means but talks around it and through metaphors instead) I'm looking forward to seeing how you handle it from here because I think you made a good start.

Yay! Faith in a corset! And I can just see Buffy warning her about that and then dressing like Xena or something so she can compensate for anything that -could- happen (actually I also just really like the idea of Angel's reaction to a nearly naked Buffy in front of people I can imagine him wrapping her up in his duster and being all possessive growly--sorry got an image that just made me giggle there)

Anyway Yay! for the Halloween portion. Looking forward to it.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

for some reason LJ is NOT forwarding these to me (it seems to have selected you to pick on today)

I'm glad the scene worked as is. I'm not sure how much story there IS after this. There's plenty before it. This is nearly the end. The Halloween party might just be the end...

Yeah, I'm not sure what anyone else is wearing. I'm assuming SPike and Illyria are coming as is. What to do with Giles...

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"The vampire messiah needs to get some sleep if he’s planning on going to the botanical gardens tomorrow."
BWAH!!!!

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

glad you were amused. Now to get the BEGINNING of this story done.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

*cracks whip*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

I'm tying. I think I accidentally got ethylene glycol in my mouth (I washed my hands after lab but...)

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

I did see the mention of a penis cup on The Cauldron...what are you DOING to yourself?

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

My students managed to shake up the fileted penises so much the preservative bubbled out of the glass lid and when I picked them up to put them away (since asking THEM to do it is like asking a 2 year old to put away his toys) I got it on my hands. My hands then went in my mouth

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

All the better to lick off fileted penii?

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

well I was eating glazed nuts (no seriously)

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

*dies*

Of course you were.

*dies again*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

They make glazed walnuts for salads (which taste not like toffee trust me)

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

I don't like walnuts so I'm afraid that's lost on me. *grin*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

Walnuts are good. Better than peanuts.

Oh speaking of nuts, Hamish has been chattering non stop (as has Makai) so you'd better start writing before it becomes the Hamish Hour. Have a new scene...part you must write since I don't know what Dylan will say to him after the thing with the Blackhorse.

Oh and had thoughts on the ending. This scene leads to Dylan looking for Ham at the shop. Does he see Cafell then or are we saving her for show two? My thought was Hamish tells him another vision about that night and includes Doo. We cut the hour when this happens. SOund good? Have another idea?

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Make them shut up.

Anything is better than peanuts.

Send ideas to me...I don't have access to anything from the past though. *sigh*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

I don't have my fucking novel but I do have the script. Oh please have you ever tried to gag a mouth as big as Makai/Ham/Connor's? I don't think they make ball gags that big.

When I'm not going ficathon insane I'll type up the new scene.