Ficlet- Barricades

[cornerofmadness]

Title Barricades
Author- cornerofmadness
Disclaimer Arakawa owns this, not me. I’m just having fun
Rating Pg-13
Characters/Pairing Roy
series manga
Timeline/Spoilers spoilers up to chapter 90+
Word Count 461
Warning none
Summary Roy tries to keep his emotions under wraps.
Author’s Note another one where Roy didn’t want to stop talking. Thanks to evil_little_dog for the beta and title. It was written for fma_fic_contest for the prompt ‘stoic’ and won third place. bay115 made the lovely banner.


XXX


The first time Roy remembered being mocked for crying was in his first year of school when his birthday came, his first without his parents. The more the other kids had called him a sissy, the harder he’d cried. His aunt taught him how to hold back his emotions. She had meant for her lessons to help him feel better. Later, Chris taught him to manipulate his emotions and the emotions of others, just in case he followed her footsteps. Roy learned well but it was the first signs of steel around him.

When he was living in Hawkeye’s home, Roy became more practiced. It took an iron will, and a lot of cold showers, to suppress his teenaged emotions around his master’s lovely daughter. More challenging, however, was trying not to show anger and distress under Hawkeye’s often harsh tutelage. Worse, as time went on, it was obvious Master Hawkeye’s mental state was becoming more fragile. Young as he was, Roy took on odd jobs around town, studied, excelled and tried never to let his worry show when, in spite of it all, there wasn’t quite enough food or heating oil.

The Academy prized stoicism and Roy had become an old hand at turning his emotions on and off. He flipped the switch into the off position for the duration of his training. Naturally, Maes took that as a challenge, doing his best to provoke Roy. The alchemist was ashamed to say he never could manage to withstand Hughes for long.

The fire and desert heat baked a shell around Roy so hard, it became a fortress. He tried to keep all his pain and anger behind those thick, war-induced walls. It seemed to work for him. His men thanked him for keeping them alive. He was made a poster boy and got promoted, even though he loathed what he had become. No one seemed to notice. Instead, jealousy over his young age and high rank and fear over what he could do got him exiled to the East. Roy hated it but he would make Eastern command his own. The North had the Wall of Briggs, the East had a womanizing slacker and no one saw behind the outer wall of his citadel to spy his ambition and cunning.

But no fortification was perfect. Seeing the mess in the Elric homestead was like a cannonball against the battlements. Silent tears shed in semi-private wore down his ramparts as he stood over Hughes’s grave while Hawkeye kept watch but Roy managed to patch his fortress walls.

It lasted until finally it flew to flinders. Envy, Maes’s murderer, crossed Roy’s path. Stoicism be damned. He tapped into the deep well of his pain and fury. Envy’s world would end in flames.

Comments

[seaweed-fma.livejournal.com]

Wow, that is a great little look into Roy' psyche. You can really feel how those walls built up and then with Envy tore down again.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thank you very much. I'm glad you enjoyed it

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

I really enjoyed reading this. Again.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thank you. I'm still mezmerized by Roy's gorgeousness in the banner

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Just so you're aware, drool shorts out computer keyboards.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

does it now?

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Of course it does.


...or makes your keys stick and not work.

[ishte.livejournal.com]

I like how you paint all the bricks in Roy's walls, and the things that started to tear them down.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thank you very much