Stories I never wrote

I had a ball working on these so if you didn't get to play and want to, give me a title and I'll write you a summary (you can specify fandom/pairing if you want)

But before I get to them I forgot this student tidbit to make you wince thru the weekend. I had no less than FIVE people ask me how to skin their cats (dissecting lab) and finally I just had to get pissy and ask.. Do you See FUR? No! Do you think those brown-red things that correspond to muscles are skin? Your cat is SKINNED. That means you skip that part in the lab book and move to sec. #2. I didn't think i needed to tell college student this but I am wrong.

And now on to titles

From evil_little_dog

Subcuteaneus -(Angel) What is he under the skin? Demon? Human? Neither? Connor thinks he’ll go mad trying to figure it out.

Following - (Wolf’s Rain) - Toboe doesn’t know why he’s so compelled to follow Tsume, after all the older wolf is nothing but mean to him but somehow he can’t seem to let go.

...And In This Corner (Fullmetal Alchemist) - Sometimes Winry thinks Ed braids his hair too tight. What other explanation is there for him challenging Flame to another fight after what happened last time.

Crash and Burn - (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) Just when Buffy thinks she has both vampires out of her system and she’s ready to move on, here they come again to wreck things.

Return Post - (Fullmetal Alchemist) - She looks for the return post every day but letters from him never arrive. What’s a girl to do when she gets tired of waiting?

Circling My Heart (Fullmetal Alchemist) - A perfect square, husband and wife, commander and adjunct, the four of them circling each other in a strange love ‘triangle’ that few would understand and the military would never accept.

For aaronlisa Anatomy for Beginners - Spike & Drusilla (BtVS)- Drusilla teaches Spike all the best places to drink from and where to get the best screams, teaching him anatomy one victim at a time.

For mjules

Snake Charmer- (X-Files ) Scully had hoped that she had seen the last of Dr. Blockhead and the Conundrum but she and Mulder cross paths with them at their new ‘circus,’ a place with a very strange snake dance act.

Mouse Skating - (Full metal Alchemist ) Winter days are long but Riza never thought the boys would do anything this retarded. Several of Mustang’s men later, she finds herself nursing a battered Roy hoping he’s learned, betting, ice and mice do not belong in the same sentence.

Persephone's Last Breath - (Star Trek: The Next Generation ) Picard rarely allowed himself personal liaisons but when the beautiful new mythology scholar comes aboard the Enterprise, he can’t help himself, even if it means his death.


Puedo Escribir - (Fullmetal Alchemist ) Maes didn’t know what he was getting into when he asked Roy how to write in the ‘language of birds.’ Who knew his naked body could be transformed into a canvas for alchemic artwork and that this much fun could be had doing it?

for vampedvixen Connor And The Studded Bullwhip - Angel - In going through Angel’s drawers looking for cash to go out on the town, Connor comes across something that scars him for life.


for leni_ba Time's Up. Welcome, Sun - Angel - After everyone dies in L.A., Connor hunts down those who betrayed his father. Harmony is the first to get captured. She has to free herself or meet the dawn

And I actually plan on writing something similar to this for my Fifth Sun series and I may just use Leni's title.

it's true

I'm apparently the sock puppet for the gods and they amuse themselves with tormenting me. I took off my glasses for the first time in a month like I said yesterday and without the weight of them, the irritated area of my nose (see, told you glasses were more dangerous than contacts sometimes) could swell at will. Either a ghost came into my bedroom last night and punched me, i slept walked into a wall or more likely, my glasses caused an osteochondritis of the junction of my nasal bones and the nasal cartilage and my nose looks like I took a punch, swollen, black and blue.

And then today, my sinuses won't stop draining through said nose. So it's not enough my nose already really hurts, now it's going to run and run all day and tickle and make me sneeze. That's right sock puppet, dance! Dance!

Called every vet in a four county region. No one will help me. If i can find Sciezca on Tuesday, I'll make the 100 mile drive to Columbus to the shelter I got my cat from 9 years ago. They take pregnant and injured cats as a priority. (couldn't find her today). Then I'll abuse my wallet by hitting the Laughing Ogre (comic book shop) and the mall (that's the closest one to me).

I did get some things done. My two exams are mostly written. Go me. And I planted the resurrection lilies evil_little_dog sent me today. Each bulb hole was personally inspected by Roy the cat who seemed to feel I'm incapable of gardening without his direct supervision. Do you know how hard it is to plant stuff with a cat firmly between your feet no matter what you do?

ETA - Thank god I just printed out my exam...because when I saved it, it went from 12 pages to 472 BLANK ones. No, I can't explain it. I pulled it back up because my printer chewed up the last page and I needed to print it again only to find my test gone. SOBS loudly.

Insanity surrounds my family

Okay before I get into the insanity I'm seriously beginning to think I was sleep walking (i do that) and broke my nose...only there's no blood anywhere. It should have bled. Maybe ruptured the cartilage from the bone. It's too swollen and black and blue to be just glasses unless releasing the pressure just gave the tissues all the swelling room they needed.

Now on to the insanity. My aunt emailed me this in response to my diseccting cats lab
"You're teaching them to do what????
I'm mad at you!!!
Don't expect the expensive Christmas gifts that you've gotten before to be there next Christmas!
I'm telling your cousin, Tipper, as soon as she gets in. She's out hanging in the neighbor's yard with two other cats, nailing moles. (Is this print big enough for a protest?) Even Tipper brings them home alive.

And your mother asked me if I wanted to adoptyour stray. SHAME ON YOU! One word ETHICS!!! You're getting litter box stuff delivered by Fed Ex. (S0 IT WILL STILL BE FRESH!!!)

My family...we should be in a book or something