Starting to feel it

[cornerofmadness]

the panic. My three hour oral exam is tomorrow at ten. I spend three hours being quizzed by three professors. I'm scared to death. I always get nervous before big exams. Been that way since grammar school. But oral exams spook me. I don't feel I do well which is odd since I've never failed on yet (but I didn't get the residencies I wanted back in medical school so maybe I did fail). I'd much rather take a written test. Maybe it's the eyes. Or maybe it's the negative connotations or more likely a combination of it since I was nervous during my first set of orals which really weren't an exam. It was CRPS, a process where you got for three days and go through a grilling by medical residency directors to see if you're good enough to get into their residency program (something all graduating doctors must do) It's a time where your best friends WILL slit your throat, will gossip and are encouraged to by doctors who more often than not drunk and more than willing to offer the position to any female doctor who'd sleep with them and then turn around and give it to the male doctor who presumably wasn't asked to do the same. To say the least it has left a lasting memory of how oral exams go on me. I'm fairly sure that won't happen tomorrow. I'm fairly sure if it did I'd be reporting them because unlike with the medical residency where I had to fend these guys off and keep my mouth shut or never see a residency and never work, I don't really need this masters. I have a doctorate. I'm just furthering my science knowlegde. I keep telling myself that. It's not really working.

Yeah, I'm nervous. Here's hoping for at least a few hours sleep. And hey to top off the day I broke my baby toe on my left foot. Whee.

Comments

[marenfic.livejournal.com]

You have my dream life-- being a professional graduate student. I would love to spend my entire life in school, learning in different fields.

My next degree will be a JD, but only because I do some forensic stuff and it would be a helpful body of knowledge to have. My husband isn't too into the idea of me never making any money though :)

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

Ah a JD, good luck. Well I do like being a student...but unforunately this return to school was mediated by a bad injury to my surgical hand. Forensics is what I actually came to Florida for but the hand injury didn't recover enough.