mondays are really beginning to rot

[cornerofmadness]

1. Bank didn't contact me and funnily enough one of my students used to work with Oak Hills and said 'get a new bank' well that says it all. They were sold over the weekend too.head desk

2. student loans didn't contact me. Screw them

3. the doctor seemed outrightly shocked at my sugars for the last two months then says Xenical has been looked at for controlling sugar. He's thrilled. And since the insulin did nothing i'm to back off on it. he's thinking now i might not need it because even flooding my system with it won't make my cells uptake sugar. which means that i might have to move to a carb blocking pill.

so why not do that

The carb blockers make you FART. Big time. What happens is all that sugar that's not absorbed goes into the colon where the bacteria (which make you fart in the first place) now have that much more food to work with. As if that's not unpleasant enough, if I'm still taking Xenical tehre's a problem.

Xenical causes you to fart...if you're lucky. It's a fat blocker. the literature that goes with it says, 'you might recognize this fat, it'll look just like the fat off pepperoni.' And it does, oily orange. They don't tell you about the hellacious stink or having to clean the toilet all teh time because well oil and water doing mix and it sticks to the sides. So you could just fart. OR you could fart and blow this oil all over your undies (well at least women can slap a panty shield there...) OR since it causes loose stools you can THINK you're farting and surprise, you do something in your pants you haven't done since you were 2.

Now I don't eat a lot of fat, never have. So I don't have that many side effects. However, if I decide to have an ice cream cone, I'd better take a book and go sit on the throne because i'm going to be there all night.

Imagining mixing this with the farty carb blocker. shoot me.

Comments

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. I'm sorry. That all sucks. You just have the worst luck. *comfort*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

seriously who was i last life? Ed Gein?

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

My pet theory was always Ghenghis Khan. ;)

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i like that theory

[0-mother-0.livejournal.com]

Oh my... Well... if it will make you feel better and be healthier... We'll just have to get you a lot of orange undies and poise pads. (But geeez, the side effects from drugs - holy moley) *hugs*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

snort. Yeah just what I wanted an early jump on Depends

[mulzrule.livejournal.com]

Mondays were made to suck, it's practically the rule, but that's just overtime. Sorry man.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks

[ba4ever.livejournal.com]

Oh lord. Explosive diarrhea. That's never not good.

[rain-oubliette.livejournal.com]

I have you and Margeaux as friends - two total freaks of nature! You with your wacked out hormones and her with her redundant colon (she had 2 - count 'em 2! large bowels... well, ok, not really two but she had enough colon to make 2!) and EDS. (Ehler's Danlose Syndrome.)

Whenever I whine about how my health sucks, you have my permission to smack me on the arm/back/chest.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

AIEEE!

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

that's an appropriate reaction

[silvrethorn.livejournal.com]

You could always just skip the pill and go on a low-carb diet. Wouldn't your Xenical just have a field day with an Atkins menu?

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i'm already ON that and have been for years with no results