Relief

[cornerofmadness]

I've been keeping a secret, a worry that i wasn't ready to put out there. Polycystic ovarian disease, in addition to making you unable to lose weight (check), gives you diabetes (check) can also kick you into early menopause. I haven't had a period in two months. I was about to call the ob/gyn for an emergency appt. I've had perimenopausal symptoms for years and I've never had a normal period. I dont' usually skip a month. I'm more of the two in one month type of gal. So this had me worried.

I knew I wasn't pregnant. Hell I can't even remember the last time I had a date so if I was pregnant, expect the world to end. But I'm not ready for menopause. I have enough health issues. I wasn't so much worried about not having kids. I've been thinking about adoption anyhow. There's more to being a parent than genetics. BUt I was worried about all the other things that go with menopause and there are ways of fending it off if it comes early. AND it can be a sign of something else being wrong with you.

So, I've never been so happy to see my stupid period. But you would know it waited until the first day of class just to be totally inconvienent. Go me.

Oddly enough the main character on The Closer is dealing with these issues so it made it easy to explain to Dad what was up with me. Point. Watch. Learn. he has asked me in the past why, since my ovaries are the reason I can't lose weight and am most likely diabetic, haven't I just had them removed since I don't really want to have kids. Well he found and sent me this article today. newsarticle at yahoo My question has to be, why are men not at higher risk (appreciably) for dementia and parkinsons since they hardly have any estrogen in them but a woman without her ovaries is very high risk. Curious bit of physiology there.

and apropos of nothing the Stouffer's bistro flat bread pizza was delicious. evil_little_dog will tell you how much I don't like frozen pizza but this was good, small but good. I had the shrimp and roasted garlic (with an alfredo sauce base), plenty of delicious buttery garlic. Ah....

Comments

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

Yipes. Dementia is one of my worst fears.

I didn't know you were thinking of having kids.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thinking more of adopting one but not until I'm more settled. Then again I'm thinking of dating again too

and yes dementia is something I'd like to avoid

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

that's what I mean. I think of adopting as having a kid.

I know I couldn't handle having kids. Cats are enough for me.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

well i've always thought that but recently seeing the mental pain some older relatives are having now (and with some of my older patients) they regret not haivng kids and the fact that I enjoy spending time with my friends kids and the ones here at the complex, which is new to me since aI was never a kid person< i've been giving it some thought

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

hm, interesting. when i was younger i was more ambivalent about it but as i've gotten older i've gotten less tolerant of kids and more certain of my lack of desire to have them.

i also just don't think i'm cut out for motherhood.

[masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com]

I decided not to have kids at 33, and regretted it vaguely at 38, but not enough to do anything about that. I'm so not a kid person. OTOH? Aunt=good.

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

I think there's also the issue of having to decide if you *really* want kids, or if it's just hormones fucking with your brain. I've had second thoughts, and then realized that it was most likely hormones having their way with me, and I felt much better.

Maybe it's easier for me to do that because I'm more of a head person than a heart person.

[masqthephlsphr.livejournal.com]

Oh, it was definitely hormones. I found the whole thing fascinating, really, observing myself from the outside and how I reacted to my nephew/neice and other stuff, like Connor+Angel, etc.

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

wow. you're almost more of a head person than i am. *checks you for pointy ears*

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

i can understand that

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

believe me I've had that thought too especially since I'm a head person too.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

I've had THAT thought too.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

yeah I have my doubts about that too. It hasn't been until the last 5 years that I've ever given it any thought

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you aren't experiencing early menopause. Have you had a bone density scan since if you're low on calcium, at least you can still do something about it?

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

no, i think i'll be talking about that with the doc the next time I'm in. I did get a good look at recent x-rays and the bone stock looked fairly decent but I'm getting to the age when a base-line density is wise

[lyricnonsense.livejournal.com]

Oooo, adopted COM-let (COMet?). From the time I've been old enough to figure out where babies came from, I've been kind of squicked out by the idea of pushing something that big through that small a hole. I think my parents thought I was strange for wanting to adopt a little baby when I played house.

Glad your plumbing is working again. And yum to garlicky buttery goodness! I'm subsiding on a mixture of dorm food (expensive but actually tasty and effortless) and pancakes from a mix (cheap and pretty tasty but effortful).

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

all the psychics have seen me with a son, for many years now. There's only a few left where i could have my own but adopting is also an option. we'll see

god I love garlic. I'm a cook. Even in the dorms I cooked for me and my dorm mates. I hardly ever eat frozen food but Stouffers is one brand I do typically like

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

When my oldest son Aaron was almost three, he wanted to know how the baby would get out as I was soon to deliver his brother Zachary. When I told him, he laughed for five minutes straight because he thought it was the stupidest thing he'd ever heard.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

snort. yeah it really doesn't make a whole lot of sense, then again having a hole the size of ababy on a permanent basis is rather daunting too

[nowhere-winry.livejournal.com]

well, at least part of you is working again.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

more or less. let's see if it stays with it

[nowhere-winry.livejournal.com]

Good luck.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks

[anat-astarte.livejournal.com]

OMG that must have been terrifying! I'm glad there is some relief now from that worry. Your dad sounds really great, I don't know many dads who could even have a conversation about this. Good luck with everything, I'm wishing you all the best all around.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks. Sometimes Dad can be real stubborn and stupid about stuff and other times he goes and does this

[anat-astarte.livejournal.com]

*smiles and nods* Yeah, I completely understand :)

[aaronlisa.livejournal.com]

That has to be rough.
Typical period though, coming when it's the most inconvienent.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

isn't that the truth

[sp23.livejournal.com]

No matter how much we hate our periods, when they don't show up when they're supposed to, it's a very scary thing. Glad to see your little friend (*snerk*) arrived.

There are many times I regret not having kids, and I'm more than a little worried about who will look after me when I'm too old to do it for myself (should I live so long). On the other hand, having kids doesn't guarantee that they'll bother about you when you're old, and I haven't had a lot of the stress of dealing with all the shit kids seem to put their parents through these days. I haven't had to hire lawyers, support a lazy layabout, or raise an illegitimate grandchild. I'm also very afraid that I would have made a terrible mom; way too many issues from my own childhood. :(

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

yep you hit on two of my other thoughts, getting old and dying alone and you're right, having kids is no proof against that. i spent over a decade working in nursing homes. I know that well

[0-mother-0.livejournal.com]

In that case, I'm glad Aunt Flo made it too - and *sigh* always at the worst possible moment...

"why are men not at higher risk (appreciably) for dementia and parkinsons since they hardly have any estrogen in them but a woman without her ovaries is very high risk. Curious bit of physiology there."

I've wondered that myself... I find it amazing that sexual hormones are so powerful over so many different systems. I guess we needn't wonder about nature's primary use for us...

And, just for a bit of balance, here's what happens after castration:
http://www.mhamic.org/treatment/castration.htm

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

thanks and yes isn't it amazing what those sex horomones actually control. And yeah, castration does stuff too, especially depending on when it's done. I'm thinking of the Castrati

[mulzrule.livejournal.com]

We do have more female dementia patients in the nursing home now that I think about it. I hope everything else works out for you.

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

yeah so did we when I was working, figures. thanks

[rain-oubliette.livejournal.com]

So much for my idea. Feh. (Removing the ovaries.)

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

not at the moment but in the future, yes I am