trying to get back into some better habits

[cornerofmadness]

since I'm sliding into the sit and stare at the wall for hours depression thing again. I'm allergic to the main sorts of antidepressants and don't like them anyhow so I end up in trouble. I need to learn to declutter, plain and simple. I swear i'll be on hoarders soon at the rate I'm going. i hate my place when it gets this messy and then i get mad at myself.

Of course part of this is the usual end of year haunting by the student loans people AND my health is bad...real bad. Like sugar went so high today i nearly blacked out talking to mom. the sugar is out of control even with me losing weight but I think that has a lot to do with the ovarian cyst I'm pretty sure developed in October which has made my whole cycle go off kilter and my emotions with it. Something felt like a knife in my side and then things went back on track last week, probably the stupid cyst popping.

the one good thing that happened today was the landlord and his workers popped in today to fix the damn toilet...just when i had every box in the world scattered all over my living room (for holidays gifts) he probably thinks i'm a fire hazard (well...)

Comments

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

sometimes the family does that. B ut you know ever since 2000, there has been this odd underlying tension that I'm at a loss to explain.

I just took the donate pile to goodwill today

[0-mother-0.livejournal.com]

That's a long time to have big, mysterious tension... Have you asked about it?

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

well i know some of the cause. when my parents hit 60, the liberal minded culturally exploring people who raised me turned into John McCain and Sarah Palin

[0-mother-0.livejournal.com]

Oh crap - they turned into MY parents :/

[cornerofmadness.livejournal.com]

and it doesn't come out unless someone starts talking about politics luckily but that's ALL my cousins want to do. My brother has finally stopped that shit. now he wants to talk investing. I'd rather talk stocks than politics