cornerofmadness

So I head to school and see that the lights are out at the marathon station and I wonder is the power out. I get to the coffee shop and yep it is. They call over to me that they can't help me because they can only do cold drinks right now and they know I don't do them.

I walk into the school and it smells like fire. Me, joined by my dean and a couple others try to find it. The chemical lock up is alarm blasting for help but it's not on fire at least. Never did find what burnt up in the power outage. Turns out there was a brush fire and they had to turn off the power because a line had come down.

My students were hoping we could go home. We can sit in the lobby with the atrium sun light and do blood pressures, pulses and work on case studies. You're MEAN Dr. Evans. Damn straight.

I ran down to Holzer to get my thyroid scan because 1 month later they still haven't sent it to my doc. It says I have most likely have a multinodular goiter. Say what? I google it because I figure there has to be other reasons other than iodine deficiency that causes this. Female hormones, hashimoto thyroiditis are the other two big culprits. I took the report to my doctor's office and said please call me if she needs me to come in. I need to call my endocrinologist and tell her to take a look too.

I think I'm going to have to start going to the coffee shop on monday (which I have less time) vs friday because that religious fitness group have started taking over the ENTIRE shop, literally commandeering every table. And they pray loudly and obnoxiously and cry a lot about god. No, seriously, crying. It takes all I have in me not to hold up a sign reading Matthew 6:5-6:6

Had to take more of the gabapentin. No pain relief. Dizzy though and nauseated. Which is okay because I can tell the neurologist that.

I forgot to work up my friday fandom stuff so I'll do it tomorrow because I need to go to bed early because I have to get up early to judge the state quarterly science fair. whee.

Where I prove no good deed goes unpunished. I think I traumatized the poor UK soccer student with the poisonous snake case study. 'The thing that's going to kill you back home is a cow.' (he pulled up the statistics on that for the class) well yes but that doesn't work with the clotting cascade stuff you're learning so hemotoxins and snakes it is.

And then I did go to the coffee house to write (finally) and try their new drink line up. They really wanted me to try the Lucky Latte with 'cereal milk' Well I don't actually like cereal never did but I said okay. It came out with lucky charms on it. It wasn't bad but I took the last table (because the bible thumpers from the faith and fitness thing across the way were there in force. I want to scream go read Matthew 6:5-6:6 at them every week) and two 80 somethings came in and I said sit with me, it's okay.

So they see I have my computer up. 'oh but you can't work with us talking.' Sure I can. I can tune you out...but NOT when you play 20 questions with me for an hour. Sobs. I didn't want to be rude and they were so fascinated to meet a doctor who was interested in herbal medicine and IS studying it at my university (though they didn't like my vaccine answer. No, you can't replace it with herbs you old hippies, get a vaccine) They wanted to friend me on facebook. I mean they were sweet old ladies but omg can't you see I'm trying to work. Oh right that was your first words to me. You just didn't think I meant it...

So I got back way late. tried to color my hair but something went wrong (it was enough to do a root cover which was enough) and I THINK I'm packed up and ready to go tomorrow. I'm still very leery of going out of the country right now but no one else seems to be.

I am still having this travel anxiety that I don't know where it came from. I just know when it started, 2005 which I chalked it up then to money I didn't have but it's still there. Sigh. even if I'm just going home it's there. It's not bad, just this vague gnawing 'I'm not ready to go' feeling. I have a checklist thinking that would help. It has not for the anxiety but I'm still glad of it.


So here's my fannish 50, the story the ladies wouldn't let me finish plus of course all my fannish recs of the week.

Painfully Pick You Apart

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel

Character/Pairing: Angel Dust/Valentino

Summary: Anthony thinks he’s found the love of his afterlife in the hot new overlord who has branded him as the rising star, Angel Dust. Dealing with his fresh-to-hell brother Arackniss, has left Angel unsettled and he thinks Valentino will comfort him. Anthony quickly learns how little Angel Dust really means to Valentino and his heart will never be the same.

Rating: mature

Author Note - Written for the allbingo prompt of tears and for spikesgirl58’s 6 word challenge. The six words were Lacking, Ruse, Panoramic, Tacky, Magnificent & Sulky. Also written for the lyrical titles duet challenge 2025 for the prompt Different lyrics from the same song using The Beast by Concrete Blonde


Content warning: gas lighting, love bombing, domestic violence, physical abuse, mental abuse

( story under here or at the link above )


Black Widow - Hazbin Hotel Fan Comic This is an ongoing fan comic

A Good Father FAKE

Self-Reflection Torchwood

by the grace of the fire and the flames 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV)魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù

One Sunny Morning Torchwood

Always Be My Loser ch 4 Hazbin Hotel wip

Dispensation The Owl House

at least i know you were mine
Arcane: League of Legends

A Stupid Crush Torchwood

untitled The Owl House ficlet

Orphan’s Club Batman

Matter of Trust Batman

Our Hero Academia: Embers, Embers, Burning Bright My Hero Academia

Random Act Of Pleasure Venom

The Radiance Of Love 9-1-1

Catwoman icons

Vices and Virtues Hazbin Hotel wip

Implementing Rule 5
Stargate Atlantis/Stargate SG-1

Reflected Hazbin Hotel

Waves of Magic Teen Wolf

So I decide to try the gabapentin. I'm supposed to take 3 a day. Let me tell you, if I did that, I'd be in a coma. Holy shit, no wonder my uncle was always kinda out of it and said his head was floating. Damn straight it was. Someone asked me today 'are you okay?' nope my head is floating. I'm not sure where I am. My feet and hands aren't connected. A LOT of people knew I was out of it. Students could see it. Nope, just nope to this drug. Maybe at night but let me tell you it took more than 8 hours to feel right again.

Not only that it can cause serious hypoglycemia (and it did) so I'd be afraid to take it and trying to sleep. And I DO have pain, I'm just too high to care. Thank god I don't have epilepsy which this drug was developed for. There has to be something better than this.

I came home, called the clinic and left a note for my endocrinologist about the thyroid nodules to see if she wants to do something more than wait 6 months.

I make my donations for fandom trumps hate and nothing is emailed to me for proof of donation via paypal. I go in there and start messing around and see that it was pulled from money waiting on me, about 80$ I go to transfer it to my bank (puzzled as my royalty check was not that high sadly) but there's no bank account. Thinking it might be that issue with my bank again. I try to chat but their AI bot is worthless but hey there's a phone number. OMG what happened next

it's a second account that is linked to my other account with one small alteration in my email (which is why I didn't get the emails) I'm like HOW? I've had my account 20 years with my email and my bank. He's like no you've had it for 24 years (oh right, I started PayPal when I was hitting eBay hard in FL) but you created a second one 8 years ago. No I didn't. Yes you did.

The only thing different was the newer one didn't have an underscore in the email name. The only thing I can think of is I accidentally did this giving it to a publisher (because 80$ would be about right for a short story and there were a couple I swore I never got paid for...) So long stupid story short I ended up transferring everything to the old account and life is hopefully good.

That was until I started getting things packed up for spring break and now ALL of my sandals are MIA. I have a vague memory of putting them all in a bag to go into my suitcase but where did I put that. At 10pm I gave up the hunt.

But all the jaw clenching from this is making my face hurt again but not nearly as bad as monday.

And then dinner was awful. I usually get a Rotisserie chicken because it's decent enough protein and takes out dinner prep two days a week. This was hands down the worst chicken ever. I think it died of old age. Jesus. My knives are sharp but I couldn't saw through this. I took a bite of a hunk I did get off. Hard, rubber, I swear I was eating cartilage. I'm not even sure I'm saving this for the cat.

I made pancakes instead. sigh.


What I Just Finished Reading:

Disco Witches of Fire Island -Blair Fell

Silent are the Dead - eh, not going to read another I don't think sadly

Murder by Cheesecake - Golden Girls mystery, yes you read that right. Not all that funny unfortunately and I wasn't a fan of all the St Olaf stuff but it wasn't a bad mystery (read it cover to cover in the ER)

Pine & Merrimac - an interesting dark mystery graphic novel

What I am Currently Reading:

Another Fine Mess - a paranormal thing, just starting it

The Tomb of Zeus - a 1920s mystery set in Crete


What I Plan to Read Next: lightweight paperbacks going into my luggage because Mexico will let me bring in a computer or a tablet but not both (and I can't read on my phone, too small, too annoying)


And here is February's reads. You know the drill, I love talking books so if you see something you want to chat about, let's hear it.

You Must Not Miss YA Horror

Mother Nature horror graphic novel (by Jamie Lee Curtis)

Ghostlore Vol. 2 horror graphic novel

We Called Them Giants horror/SF graphic novel

When the Bones Sing YA rural horror

Mozzarella Murder mystery

The Turn of the Screw and Other Stories Gothic horror

Angels of Death, Vol. 1 horror manga

H.P. Lovecraft's The Shadow Over Innsmouth horror manga

Carmilla Volume 2: The Last Vampire Hunter LGBT/horror graphic novel

Rare Flavours horror graphic novel

A Grim Reaper's Guide to Catching a Killer mystery/paranormal

The Princess and the Grilled Cheese Sandwich LGBT/fantasy romance graphic novel

I love snow but even I'm tired of this.

Work went well but I was standing around talking to J and L when my knee gave way to the point I had to be sat down. The knee cap wasn't tracking but that happens with me and it's an easy fix. I didn't think much of it as I headed to Gallipolis.

I wanted to go to Aldi's. It's been there forever but it's also 20 miles from me so I wasn't sure I wanted to go there and then thought you'd dumb. You're in Gallipolis at least every other week (it's only 10 miles from work) Everyone told me how great Aldi's is.

Maybe...just not this one. The produce wasn't much better or cheaper than Kroger (the eggs were more) I don't eat a lot of frozen food or food in a box so that wasn't great. No pet section period. What it did have that I liked was cheese. OMG the cheese. My Kroger's cheese offerings suck ass. I have to go to the one in Athens 40 miles away if I want cheese that's not Kraft's or Sargento's.

I went for dinner fixings. Unless a cheese and olive plate is dinner I failed. I got a semi-soft coffee rubbed goat (yum), a soft everything bagel goat (YUM), a smoked gouda (good taste, weird texture) Wensydale of apricot and white chocolate (good but also weird texture) and halloumi 'fries' (didn't make them yet)

I went home and by dinner I realize something when I could see my knee...maybe I shouldn't have been walking that much. The scar is indented in badly. I'm like was that pop the fibular head breaking again? I'm neuropathic so I'm not going to feel it. Did the medial cartilage pop out and the knee has collapsed down on that side? Also very possible, hurts over there (that side has intact nerves) it's swollen. It's hurting a lot now. I will have to keep an eye on it. I should put ice on it but I keep forgetting to get it out of the freezer (eye roll)

I do have a story scene for spikesgirl58's 6 word challenge. The six words were
Precision, Strike, Mill, Cord, Way, & Recommend

( NSFW bondage/electroplay scene, will be part of something longer )

And here are the fannish 50 story recs of the week

the winner takes it all wip Hazbin Hotel

A Little TLC Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Always Be My Loser wip Hazbin Hotel

First Line Of Defence Torchwood

In a Family Way Man from Uncle

Vices and Virtues wip Hazbin Hotel

Here We Are at the Start
镇魂 | Guardian

On Valentine's Day FAKE

The Night Before 9-1-1

Confrontation and the Next Steps Teen Wolf

At 630 I'm awoken by the sounds of the ocean...uh-oh. It sounds like a wash machine agitator on high. Yeah so a pipe has broken somewhere because it ain't raining/snowing that hard. I panic. MY HOT WATER TANK! wasn't that. OMG they'll need into the wall for the pipes (you can undo some screws in the computer room and do that) Guess what that is walled in by 1001 books and an equal number of stuffies and random detritus on the sleeper sofa in there. I must clean this.

I last until 730 when I say two things a) fuck it, let them throw me out for being a hoarder b) wait, it only took 1 hour to clean this? I've been avoiding it for 8 months. I text my landlord about this and go to work.

From there I go to the doctor's and that's when I have time to check my phone. My text didn't send (which happens out here, dead spots everywhere). I retext them and 'they'll check it tomorrow.' Look I'm not the one paying for the hundreds of gallons of water nor do I have to pa y to fix all the damage this is doing. I mean before the sump pump there was a lake under my bedroom complete with frogs. I'm used to living in hell. Rentals barely exist here so the housing prices are stupid for this very low income area.

Hope I can sleep because it still sounds like a laundromat under my bed. And now I'm wondering if they turned off the water on monday looking for a leak because I think it has been slowly leaking (sump pump turning on when it's not raining) and now it's broken entirely.


So if my doctor's new patient intake is going to be a thing for all hospitals I'm throwing myself off the roof. Holzer and King's Daughter really go whole hog on the how are you coping with life stuff vs asking about meds/new issues like my places up in Chillicothe but King's Daughter today asked me about falls at home. Am I safe at home? Do I have a home? Do I have food? Can I afford my food/home/meds? (what are you going to help? This is a Catholic system so maybe they DO help), we need to do a mini cognition (is this for everyone? I'm not even 60? Yes I whining about my memory a few days ago but still, this seems excessive) No lie she hands me a piece of paper and gives me three words to remember. Now draw a clock for me. Are you fing with me? So I do. Now draw in 11:10. ARGH. And the words are village, kitchen baby.

ANd then the nurse hands me release of records for CVS to get proof of vaccination. I am not lying I was with her longer than I was with the doctor and me and the doc were shooting the shit about being women doctors (since she asked about my research) and how badly we've both been treated by male doctors.

She is concerned about my neck and my issues of the chest pain/pressure relieved by coughing. She does think I'm probably right about the hiatal hernia so has kicked it back to me to get a gastroenterologist. She is concerned with the swelling on one side of my neck. Could be a lipoma Could be something with my thyroid. She did a chest x-ray to make sure that cardiomyopathy that killed my uncle isn't showing up there (it's not, I've already read the report) and I need a neck/thyroid ultrasound. My thyroid levels are normal.

I tell mom this and she goes you know your uncle (the one who's dying) has hashimoto's (no I did not) and your cousin (the one who was just diagnosed with alzheimer's) had to have part of her thyroid removed. Did not know that either. I'll call the doc and let her know.

I also don't know what is up with my blood sugar. Ate salad for lunch (with 4 strawberries) and my blood sugar is 350. Went for Mexican tonight and went ham on the corn chips. Blood sugar is 230. Why?

What I Just Finished Reading:
A Grim Reaper's Guide to Catching a Killer by Maxie Dara, it got better at the end but still gonna be another writerly ways coming out of this

Angels of death manga - meh

Rare Flavours - graphic novel set in India cw-cannibalism

.
What I am Currently Reading:



Disco Witches of Fire Island -it's hard to say I enjoy this given the subject matter but I like these characters

Silent are the Dead - mystery, i think it's a little too heavily leaning on the last book (which I didn't read) but i'm only on chapter 3






What I Plan to Read Next: probably something from the popsugar line up plus the dozen arcs I have.